The Dangers of Self-Help
Is self help bad is a rather unusual question is it not?
How can something positive with the intention of benefiting one self be harmful?
Allow me to explain.
Self help when it is used as a tool for self improvement and reaching ones’ maximum potential, overcoming challenges, accomplishing ones’ dreams and goals, is great.
But like with most things too much of anything is dangerous.
If self help failed you, you are not alone, many people have failed with self help.
There is a problem with the need to constantly improve oneself, it comes from the assumption you are not good enough or there is something wrong with you.
In the beginning of the journey this is fine, but, if you are still chasing this desire for improving you are doing it wrong and in fact, you will improve yourself out of not feeling enough.
This is a death trap this sucks you into a spiral of an endless chase of improving yourself while never obtaining happiness either.
When self help works it creates a blueprint to help you identify what you need to do more of and what you need to do less of.
Self help teaches us what are some for better ways to think, habits, and how successful people think(and do).
But, this underlying idea that there is something wrong with you in the first place is wrong and in fact dangerous to your self esteem and self worth.
The quest for improving thy self is innate in all of us.
Nothing wrong with this of course.
This is not at all what are speaking of in this article here, we are discussing this quest for improvement until…well, forever.
You will always be stuck in the cage of self improvement if you are always looking at life from the lens of ” I am broken” or there is something wrong with me.
Identifying there is an issue is the first step to healing and change, which is great, but there comes a point in time when you are good enough.
The endless chasing and desire to improve oneself can make you not realize you are already enough.
Sure, there will always be things you can improve about yourself, but so what, why not love yourself for that you are.
Because, this moment, is all you really have.
And by changing your mental filters you can see that you are in fact good enough and not broken but you are not realizing it yet.
If of course, you feel on a deep down emotional level that there is a problem then for sure dive deep into that and explore why that is. Seek professional help if you must. You won’t see me steering you away from your desire for healing.
But, this is not what we speak of my dear readers, what I speak is why do you feel broken and not enough. Why is it that you not like yourself already? What is it that is holding you back from loving who you are here and now.
Sometimes self love must be “earned” which in that case, seek it, and fulfill it, so that you will finally arrive at the same conclusion which is that you were always enough.
Just never seeing it, because, of societal programmings, and this constant desire for improving of thyself, and chasing, and chasing…
And you can chase, until the day you die. And you still wouldn’t be enough to the foolish ideal standards of perfection.
You will never be perfect, but, you can be perfect in the very thing you are now.
A beautiful work of art, that is always improving itself for the very purpose of procreation and the quest for love.
Yes, this is in your very essence, deep down inside your soul, inside your own DNA.
This is what the desire for improvement is all about.
The quest for love.
Both of others, and self approval.
We are not saying you have to “skip” the steps or not desiring to improve thyself, of course not.
What we are saying is to appreciate that which you already are, and still, yes – strive to better yourself.
You can hate yourself till the day you die.
You can improve yourself till the day you die, and you know, you still wouldn’t be happy.
Checkout the resources down below, to enrich, the quality of your life from the inside out.