Will A Relationship Make You Happy?
There are pros and cons to getting into a relationship.
For most, they probably shouldn’t get into a relationship until they are ready.
A relationship can be wonderful to explore everything that is you, your very essence, and you can discover who you really are or not in one.
But, the wrong relationship or the wrong person can leave you more damaged that it ruins all your future relationships going forward.
Some, people never recover from their previous relationships.
Truthfully, you can fall in love with anyone on a logical level and make them your dream partner.
On a logical level, the difference between one human to the other isn’t a whole lot.
There are small big differences, but, a human is a human.
The main difference is the experience or we can call spirit(or soul).
Our very own DNA is setup for procreation, replication, and relationships.
But, from a pure science stand point, relationships are just a means to an end for the case of replication.
Society is depended on people and if people decide they don’t want to procreate it could be the end of society.
Therefore, our desire to find a relationship, love, and a soul mate is in our own biology.
Which is why the motivation to stay in a relationship is really not our primal objective.
It is simply to replicate and duplicate the gene and DNA and pass it down.
Love is not like Disney or what the movie portrays.
It is true, it can be, somewhat like that, but it’s overly romantic, and more based on best case scenarios.
This is what people gets hooked on, what they see on the movies, TV, read in books, etc.
They imagine it will look a certain way or feel a certain way and when they don’t experience it they go into a different relationship in hopes they will find that “magical experience” or that “love high.”
This is true for men and women(more so for women).
Realistically speaking, relationships or love will not make you happier.
It will simply be an addition to your life.
Some people, they believe their partners will make them happy or should make them happy.
But, happiness is solely based on the person.
People cannot make you happy.
No one can make you happy, only you can make yourself happy.
Leaving others to make you happy, is shifting the responsibly unto others to make you happy which is impractical and chances it will fail.
Because state is internally based(also based upon biology/physiology).
You will often see miserable people blame others for their level of unhappiness.
And this is because they don’t want to admit, that they have a problem.
They also want to deny the reality of why they are unhappy which is themselves.
It feels a lot more safer to say “I am not happy because of others.”
It keeps them safe and avoiding responsibility.
But, if you were to dive into that person’s reality you will discover all their relationships tend to have the same pattern.
Their history and life has the same pattern.
And, this is because their life is not based upon a strong foundation is based on little small hits they need to latch onto to make them feel safe, secure, and good about themselves.
If you make yourself happy first, then, you will notice it will be easier to have a happy relationship.
Not always true, but will definitely make it easier, because your happiness and satisfaction is not depended on your partner.
Some people, think it is others job to make them happy, which is simply not true, and not how the world works.
Other people will help here and there, but there role is not to live your life it is simply to be a helping hand.
There are plenty of reasons why modern relationships don’t work and one of the biggest one is most people get into relationships out of lust, boredom, sexual attraction, etc.
In that case, those people are better off dating casually, to simply hook up and not date.
If you want a happy relationship you have to get into the practice of filling your own cup first.
Make you happy first and it will be infinitely easier to enter into a happy relationship, because you will be in the energy and vibration of a more positive flow. This positive flow will open up more positivity in your life.
What about people who are miserable and want to enter into a relationship? They are better off waiting. But, then the counter argument, maybe, a relationship will remove their unhappiness. Which it won’t, but the right person can make it a little better and easier. But, as previously said no one can make you happy.
Note: Nothing that is said in this article is an absolute truths, it is more of a best recommendation(or guidelines).
Some, people are secretly miserable because they don’t have a special someone in their life. If this is the case, the right approach would be to start meeting some new people. But, of course start slow and build up. People who are desperately looking for someone to feel up that void won’t cultivate the right space for a healthy loving relationship either. But, if they are just looking for casual romance, they can do that as well, and see where it leads.
The Hookup Culture
This era has appropriately been renowned as the hookup culture for many good reasons.
Relationships are hollow and superficial.
It has nothing to do with getting to know someone and it is more about speed and hooking up as opposed to really building a loving relationship.
And, if one is simply looking for a casual dating nothing wrong with that.
On top of this there is no real reason to stick to a relationship anymore, as the previous reasons why people stuck together is no longer in play(religion/tribal culture).
So now, we have a bunch of people looking to get their freaky on.
Modern dating is possibly at the worst its ever been.
Most people complain about how dating is today.
I don’t think many people are happy in their relationships.
This is definitely a byproduct, of the current modern world we are living in, which is fast-paced, and so much abundance.
Everyone is replaceable, and we don’t appreciate anything.
Also, our expectations and standards are higher.
To get better relationships we have to have lower expectations, and more realistic standards.
Obviously, you can only pick one person to be your special person, and you want the best you can get.
But, for most people they think their partners need to be perfect or to be superman.
And no man/or woman can meet those nearly perfect standards.
As people get older they learn this and slow down a bit.
Perhaps, this is just way it is.
No a relationship will not make you happy.
You have to make yourself happy first and only then can you make a stable, healthy, relationship work.
Even still, it may fail, but it will have a better foundation to build one from as opposed to two people are who miserable trying to make it work, but can’t.
If you can’t expect to make yourself how can you ever possibly expect anyone to make you happy.
You have to fill up your own cup first.
It is best to get in a relationship when you are in a healthy space to be in, otherwise, it will be starting from the wrong place.