If you found the “ONE” in your life, but something is wrong, what should you do?
If you are 100 percent this person is the best for you on multiple levels,
then you shouldn’t give up on this person.
Instead, you should just go more slow.
Proceed the relationship more slowly.
Personally, I’ve met people in my life who I thought “man we would be perfect together”
but there was something missing.
And, that was the slow relationship building.
When two people first meet there are a lot of insecurities, fears, doubts, worries, etc. being projected on both sides.
This doesn’t mean you should end the relationship, but, it does mean maybe you have to proceed the relationship more slowly, compared to the original thought.
Sometimes, I meet a women, who I think man me and this person would be perfect together. We are very similar and can connect on all levels.
But, because, I jumped the gun, and moved way too fast, it made things very awkward.
And that’s because I was visualizing us in the future, as already dated, already gone through the relationship…
Essentially, I was skipping plenty of steps.
Relationships is work, there is no way around that. Everything in life worth the effort is work.
If you found your soulmate but the timing is wrong, simply slow down, take a break, and maybe see other people until you and your lover can rekindle the flames.
Like I said, before, I have approached a few women who I thought were perfect for me, and as a result I looked kinda dumb and felt embarrassed.
Because, I was imagining what we could be. But, I also forgot the here and now is where we are.
This is the issue with creating expectation and having your hopes up.
Reality tends to crash and burn us when we have a vague idea of how something “SHOULD” go.
I met a women, I love very much, but, the amount of pain and suffering I went through in this relationship destroyed my pride and my ego as a man.
(combine that with the fact I’ve been sick for the last 3-4 months, and life has been hell for me)
In my mind, our compatibility was essentially perfect, but, I failed to realize it would take time.
No matter what, you have to go through the stages of life. There is no skipping steps.
Sure, there are few ways to cut corners here and there. But, life has these invisible steps that you must follow.
In this case, becoming friends first, starting out slowly, making connections slowly, not presenting baggages too early.
One of the biggest lessons I learned, in relationships, it’s better to go slower to build trust and comfort.
I rushed in one of my recent relationships and was disappointed on many levels, but that’s because of my expectation and hopes.
I failed to see reality, but I was also imagining a future as it was already here. But, unless the other person sees it too then they will feel very awkward, because all they can see is the current reality.
This is why if you do meet the one, yet something is missing, go slower, build trust, rapport, safetyness, etc.
Don’t reveal too much in the beginning, play it safe so you and the other person feel comfortable around each other first.
I also learned, it’s better to be honest with your intentions from the very beginning otherwise, it will all backfire.
It always does, because, the truth will always come out one way or the other.
Relationships, are complex. There are rules and yet there are no rules…
But, there are tips that make good practice.
Like slowly introduce yourself, and lower your expectation, little by little you and your partner can workout the differences.
There is no skipping the steps. This process must happen before, you and your partner can merge as ONE.
Until Next Time,
With Love,
Davinci Neptune
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