Approaching someone you have a crush on or are madly in love with can be incredibly difficult.
You are left wondering ‘what do I say, what if he doesn’t like me, or does he like me’.
The first thing you want to do is relax, calm your mind of all the thoughts about what can happen.
The way most interactions happen is not actually directly…
It is natural and effortless.
For example, let’s say a girl has a crush on a guy in a church.
She is interested in him but doesn’t know if he likes her back.
So, one thing she can do is sit next to him one day and just see his vibes and body language.
A good sign is he notices you there, maybe even makes a smile.
*note there are many variants of responses for any number of reasons we are focused on what is true most of the time*
Then try to initiate a conversation with him with Easy topics. Ie; What is your favorite quote from the bible? What were you like before you met Jesus? How has Jesus helped you?
*I know this is a religious tone we are NOT focusing on the religious details, it is just easy topics to work with depending on the environment*
This is to break the ice.
Then as you to slowly talk you and the other person are slowly developing rapport.
Most communications are non-verbal, so even without saying much people get a certain vibe from you.
You can do all of this while almost facing zero rejection.
While you are talking to the other person you can pick up to see how much they are interested or attracted to you.
Interest and attraction are different.
Interest is they see you as a potential friend, or maybe with more interactions a potential boyfriend/girlfriend.
Attraction is when someone instantly feels that sensation to go in someone’s direction. There is a strong magnetic pull to meet someone, you sometimes don’t even know why you are attracted to someone.
If you are attracted to someone trust it and see where it goes.
Once you and the other person have developed rapport because you have been talking and feel comfortable with each other then you can expand your interactions and things you talk about.
Warning: Do NOT talk about too many risky or red flag topics upon the first meet. Saying the wrong stuff too early too soon will turn people off. This is not inauthentic, this is just social intelligence. If you reveal certain things too soon you risk making a very bad impression which can KILL their interest or even attraction.
Attraction is a bit harder to kill though, because even when someone does something you don’t like you can’t help to feel attraction to someone.
Anyhow, when approaching someone it works best when you have an EXCUSE or a REASON to approach someone.
In school, it was can I get a pencil.
Anything at all that can hook them into a conversation with you in a friendly and light way.
This will be dependent on what you are into and they are into.
So, I don’t know a bad example, but let’s say I see a blogger who loves to read books.
I could approach her and say hey I love your blog what are your favorite books to read and why.
And just let it flow.
Why? It is easy and safe, also easy topics for her to talk about without making her think.
-create an excuse to interact/break the ice
-create rapport and connection by getting to know them
-feel the vibes, see how much they are interested in you by their vibes, energy, and their level of interest.
People fear rejection.
There is good news and bad news.
The good news is that there are plenty of ways to see if someone is interested or attracted to you without even facing rejection.
The bad news is, that sometimes you will have to risk rejection.
But, if you don’t try you will always be left wondering what could have been.
You could be losing out on really good experiences.
Some which the universe is trying to align you with.