Everyone makes mistakes we all do, and that is expected.
Admitting your own mistakes and flaws to yourself and others is one of the hardest things to do.
Do you ever have those friends who no matter how hard you tried, can’t change their mind on something?
You know you are right, and they are wrong, but because they don’t want to feel wrong they won’t admit they are wrong.
It takes humility to admit one is wrong.
Some people think we form this defense-mechanism(bias) to avoid feeling bad about ourselves to not distract us with the negatives and just keep moving forward.
Let’s say there was a caveman who was hunting deer and if the caveman attempted to hunt, failed, and decided he was not good at hunting and quit.
This caveman didn’t have the defense mechanism(bias) to prevent themselves from feeling bad, so instead of trying again they just quit. They will get less of the benefits that come with hunting.
Now, imagine the opposite caveman who went hunting, never gave up, never blamed themselves, but put the blame elsewhere, since the defense-mechanism(bias) was there they were able to continue hunting until they were finally successful at it. Thus, reaping the benefits that come with hunting.
The second caveman in this scenario who had the defense-mechanism was more likely to succeed at hunting.
It is said those genes were passed down to us, and thus, we have this pre-build bias against mistakes, and failures, and avoid any wrongs.
The thing is we live in a completely different world today than in the stone days. We are more civilized and the things that were good in the past are not always good, and are perhaps outdated.
So, let’s say the theory is correct and those genes of the defense-mechanism(bias) were stored in our DNA then it would be very difficult to admit they are wrong about things in our life, especially to others.
What is so bad about admitting your mistake?
The fear of negative consequences(especially social consequences).
People are afraid that other people will look at them as if they are stupid, or flawed in some way.
But, this isn’t really true, and this is just our minds playing tricks on us. We are afraid and worried, and instead of owning our mistakes we put the blame elsewhere.
For example, let’s say a man who was bad at talking to women, he might say something like “women don’t like me because I am short.”
While it may be true, some women are attracted to taller guys, to put the blame on being short is really an excuse, to avoid admitting they suck at talking to women.
Which for men I’d imagine is quite difficult to admit especially because of the societal pressure of being good at it.
It is also true some women don’t like tall men, but, short men.
Studies have shown women do prefer taller men, but, how much really does that become a factor?
If the guy improves his social skills and gains confidence in himself then he would be able to talk to women, no matter how tall he is, even if he is a midget.
So instead of complaining about the predicament, he can just accept his current skill level, and just keep working on himself, and improving himself, and eventually, he will have some “game.”
Another reason, people don’t want to admit flaws or mistakes is, that they don’t want to admit they are flawed in a type of way because it feels bad.
This is more so in public, people don’t want to admit mistakes in public for this very reason because they are afraid of how others may react.
This will lower other people’s perception of them, thus leading to less benefits(of whatever kind).
Here’s the thing by simply accepting owning your flaws you will look more attractive.
People will hardly notice you made a mistake if you admit it or accept your flaws.
If you lie or try to cover up your flaws, it looks even worse!
The key thing here is humility.
If you are humble enough to accept you have areas where you yourself need to improve on people will hardly notice your flaws or mistakes.
But, if you are in a relationship, and you never admit you are wrong, people will eventually get tired of it because there will be no point in having any sort of conversation if the person can never admit they are wrong. It will be a never-ending conversation, going back and forth ending with no resolution.
Some people, just want to be right, no matter what.
They think they know everything.
But the wisest people are aware of their own ignorance, because, there is a vast amount of potential knowledge in the world, we can only know a fraction of reality.
No one is expected to know everything nor do they have to.
It’s okay to make mistakes.
It’s okay to have flaws.
What’s not okay is denying it.
What’s not okay is lying about it.
Accept who you are at this moment in time and keep improving.
You will eventually be who you want to become.